YOGURT!

As I loaded the groceries into the car the day before Christmas Eve, Lily decided that she wanted to HOLD the yogurt we had just purchased as we drove home. Seeing nothing in particular wrong with this, I commenced rifling through the grocery bags looking for said yogurt. While this was taking place, my glove-less hands were beginning to freeze solid and my booted feet, though dry, were near frostbite. After a ridiculous amount of time spent searching for this trivial request I returned to Lily.

JANE: "I'm sorry. I just can't find the yogurt. But you can have some as soon as we get home."

Apparently this response was not acceptable to my three-year-old child as she commenced chanting "YOGURT, YOGURT, YOGURT!" through screaming wails. I think Dr. Spock said something about ignoring children when they throw a fit so I got into my seat and tried to turn the cheery Christmas music up loud enough in the front to drown out a portion of her disgust with me. "The happy elf. I'm the happy elf. I'm the happy elf and I just might stop on by."

Then I noticed that Lily's complaining increased from simple chanting to more complex statements.
LILY: "Stupid Christmas lights. I don't want Christmas lights. I want YOGURT!!!"
"Crazy Santa Claus. I don't want Santa Claus. I want YOGURT!!!"
Dumb Christmas trees. I don't want Christmas trees. I want YOGURT!!!"

Wow, I could have saved a lot of money and just bought yogurt for her stocking.